“Life is not an even distribution”

When parenting my young children, I usually say a simple phrase over and over to help with their comprehension of a topic (I’m sure I’m not alone :)) If that isn’t successful, I’ll sometimes rephrase the message with the hope that the new wording will help increase understanding and “click”.

The other day, after several repeats of “life isn’t always fair”, I spouted “life is not an even distribution”. I chuckled even as I said it because they have no clue what it meant and I’m sure my recollection from high school statistics is a bit drafty as well.

The general idea is that an even distribution has a clear, centered average, where the highest frequency exists, and the extremes, have a decreasing frequency that is equally represented in either direction.

It got me thinking, where is my life on the distribution? Does how I feel match where I am?

Living life “on the curve” for me usually feels like the upper percentile. One of the downsides of living a life of mostly plenty is the feeling of entitlement to always living that life. So when we slip down toward the median, it can be easy to think that life is in dire straits.

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Thinking about this helped me reflect on Jesus’ words to the rich man “it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for one who is rich to enter the kingdom of God (Matt 19:24).” In richness comes the expectation of comfort and the luxury of annoyance and righteous anger at trivial concerns.

Sometimes it takes something small like a rugged backcountry camping trip, or large like a pandemic or war or a tornado touching down (this happened yesterday in our area!), or just the regular reality of living in a family and driving daily to reiterate that:

1. I am not in control.
2. Everything is a gift.
3. Everything can be taken.
4. Gifted or not, taken or not, Blessed Be the Name of the Lord!

Cultivating gratitude is something I continue to work on, specifically to help me focus on how grace-filled life is, and to accept suffering as scripture recommends and the Saints often did, with welcome and as an opportunity for purification. Sometimes I’ll read about a tragedy and think “but for the grace of God there was I.” I wish that it didn’t take these “reality checks” to help jumpstart gratitude sometimes, but I will keep at it and ask for the grace to see more clearly every day!

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God is good.
All the time.

All is gift.
A life well lived,
is a journey, not a game.
All will return from whence it came.

And that place is better still.

So till,
while the soil is plenty,
that our hands not be empty,
when at His will,
our bodies still,
we return to eternity.